Archive for the ‘mea culpas’ Category
Kit Bond, the Republican U.S. Senator from Missouri once thought to be a specialty brand of adhesive for model airplane enthusiasts, is apparently still sniffing the good shit.When it comes to the stimulus plan, this good ol’ boy is having his cake, eating it, and sending a flaming pile of resultant crap out through his flaks. Continue Reading »
Nope, no idea what this means,
but we like it.
The O-Town express has laid out its plan for stemming the Michael Bey-scale craptide of foreclosures, and TrezSec Timothy Geithner has at least mentioned that he’s got a few ideas for helping out the banks last week over a Frozen Tangerine Dream® during Applebees’ Happy Hour. But given the auto executives’ PR nightmare a few months ago when they were carried into the Congressional hearing room on the shoulders of 18 UAW eunuchs adorned with golden fleece and a soft shell of Godiva chocolate, we thought it best to provide a few tips for those fine banking industry folks to avoid pissing us off (anymore). Continue Reading »
“Happy Fucking Valentine’s Day, Barack – I’m Outta Here. Have fun with your two concubines from Maine and that slut Specter, you two-timing transformational messianic hunk! You told me I’d be your only true elephant! Oh God – it hurts, oh it hurts…” Judd Gregg began his press conference to announce that he was giving back the 24-karat cabinet post he received from Barry beneath the Lincoln Memorial. Continue Reading »
He’s a busy boy, our Barry. On Thursday #44 created the office of faith-based initiatives – and this time it’ll actually do more than teach kids that sex is evil in all forms until you’re married. Welcome to the age of faith-based fornication! Oh wait, apparently that’s not quite what it’s about either… We’ll have to get back to you on that one. Let’s see what else… Looks like BO also had a little problem involving his labor nominee and some tax problems. Maybe just throw that one over there with the others, we’re all spent on tax evasion jokes (can we deduct that expense?)… Finally, the Prez wrapped up his day with his first flight on Air Force One to a Democratic conference where he beat down Republicans with his hopestick. Continue Reading »
So let’s see – half the professional sports world gets Christmas cards from Balco, the governing body that oversees the Olympics is notoriously scandalous and tainted by corruption, and yet one pic that would be considered tame by modern MySpace standards hits the tabloids… and one of the greatest American athletes of our time gets suspended and his entire career is now in question?
This shit isn’t supposed to happen with a black President! (No, not because all black people smoke pot. At least we don’t think that’s true… Anyone ever hit a spliff with Michael Steele?) Continue Reading »
It was a rough day for the big B.O. – you might even say it stunk. Two Obama insiders removed themselves from the running for jobs in the administration, including the biggest Democratic donkey of late, Driving Mister Daschle himself. But that wasn’t the real surprise of the day – it came later when we watched an American President apologize profusely. Wha?? But doesn’t that mean that the terrorists have won? Here’s how it came to this: Continue Reading »